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    Let the Magic Flow!

    Let the Magic Flow!

    I was just listening to a podcast of Tom Fuld- The Heart of Healing, and the guest said-

    "If I can get kids to take ownership of their lives by internalizing their needs and accessing their deep internal passion...their pathway to success and satisfaction is predictably good."

    If this sounds familiar, it is. I was honored to be Tom's guest.

    This is a common theme of mine and one that has become rooted into my
    CollegeLogic programming. Tom brought it out of me in his podcast. You can listen here.

    It all leads to taking appropriate action. The key is to have the internal need come from deep within one's passion and desire for life. It has to be genuine and authentic for it to work its magic. If it's coming from the outside world, such as from a parent or teacher, it won't work any magic. 

    CollegeLogic students are continuously tasked with accessing their passion and desire for internalizing their needs. As a result, I get to witness their magic flowing from it on an everyday basis. 


    Opportunities and Homeless Veterans

    Opportunities and Homeless Veterans

    Opportunity is gained by distinguishing yourself from the pack.

    There are three quick keys to distinguishing yourself from the pack. 

    - Showcase skills & abilities over certificates

    - Express passion & desire over random ideas

    - Demonstrate substance over surface interests


    As we look ahead to college and entrance into the workplace thereafter, I like to focus students on building their unique basket of skills and abilities, pursuing their true internal passion and desire, and then demonstrating real substance for who they want to become (fresh from last week's memo).

    What does this have to do with homeless Veterans? Most don't have a pathway to build upon their skills and abilities, pursue their internal passion and desire, or demonstrate real substance. Unless they are cared for by great organizations like Homes for the Brave, who work daily with struggling Veterans in this way, they don't have people advocating for their interests. 

    My band
    Gold Dust is advocating for their interests. We are playing a dedicated show to support Veterans being cared for at Homes for the Brave. But we need your help. Will you please join us in advocating for their interests by clicking here to make a donation?

    We thank them for their service.
    I thank you for your support!

    Life's Achievements...may be overrated!

    Life's Achievements...may be overrated!

    Life isn't about what you can achieve, but rather what you can become!

    As we approach our July 4th celebration, think about who you can become.

    Why? Because there's no place on earth like the U.S. for becoming the person you'd most like to become. But you have to have that mindset...and few do.

    If accumulating achievements is what you're after, then that's how you'll be judged.  

    If becoming a kinder and gentler, considerate and caring person full of inspiration and encouragement to share with others, then that's how you'll be judged.

    I'll leave it up to you to decide upon for yourself.

    Me? I'm still working on what I can become. It's been a 50-year work in progress (I started after Little League, ha)!

    Misguided Strategies and Rejections

    Misguided Strategies and Rejections

    When the learning-curve talks, people should listen! 


    There are several ways to be told "No". 

    I remember the first time I asked a girl out on a date like it was yesterday...she said- "No".

    First kiss attempt..."No".

    I tried out for the H.S Varsity Basketball team..."No".


    There are "No's" and there are "Rejections".

    I was born in Tennessee. I wanted to attend the Univ. of Tennessee..."Denied" (same as rejected, ha).

    Okay, UVA..."Denied".

    Somewhere along the way, I got a date, a first kiss, an acceptance into Clemson. I tried out for their golf team..."No". 

    Who forgets those early no's, rejections, denials? Not me. I remember them better than the yesses.

    I was visiting with my Therapist just last week. She asked me- "Do you have scars left from any teen-age rejections?" 

    I said- "Yes!" (I won't mention her name to protect the guilty, ha)

    My wonderful therapist said- "That answers some real questions."

    Do you still remember when you were rejected by that boy or girl, team or group of friends? If you really felt it, you will never forget it.

    As parents, if we felt the pain then and can still remember it now, maybe we need to think about that as we formulate a college application & admission strategy for our kids. 

    Sure, it's perfectly okay to get a denial or two, but how about 6, 8, 10, or even 15 denials? Does that bother you? Not likely because it's not your pain, rather, it's your child's pain. 

    Your child’s future or sense of self-esteem should not be bet on a shot in the dark to YOUR dream school (not a typo…your dream school, not theirs).

    Stick with me here. This is a constant theme ringing throughout America and beyond. People applying to 10, 12, 15, 18 colleges on a whim that just maybe their child was suddenly a qualifier for admissions into "reach" schools or that applying to more schools would create greater opportunities for a reach-school acceptance. 

    The "just maybe" strategy was born in the "Test-Optional" era. It's a terribly misguided strategy filled with fallacies and predictable, painful results.

    I've seen and heard so many parents gloating over the names and numbers of colleges their child applied to. But those same parents typically go silent a few months later upon receiving the predictable admission decisions.

    All that effort and energy going into writing several supplemental essays and then submitting 8, 12, or even 15 applications to mostly "just maybe" schools would yield much greater results if used on the 5 - 6 top priority and realistic colleges of your child. 

    And quite frankly, getting four of six acceptances surely beats getting a stream of ten or twelve denials.

    In full disclosure here, a dad-client of mine and I were just having this discussion last weekend. He inspired this memo and helped me craft the message.

    He did something very unusual, and yet, very effective...perhaps even brilliant. The family strategy was to apply to six colleges with two being their daughter's top priority colleges. The other four applications combined match and reach schools. Upon receiving the first two decisions, both acceptances to her top two schools- Texas A&M and Northeastern, they withdrew the other four applications.

    Most people would ask, why would they do that? Dad instinctively knew that his daughter could live her life knowing that she was 2-for-2! There was no further need to add possible rejection into the mix. She'll be off to Northeastern in the fall. I love that.

    On the contrary, each year I receive so many random calls from unhappy parents sharing their woes upon learning of their child being denied many times over, including denials from their top choice schools. They must look to me to have a sympathetic ear.  

    If the learning-curve could talk, it would say-

    Ditch the just-maybe strategy. Don't chase the test-optional policy. Rejections are not your loss nor your pain. Rather, the pain is felt by your child and is a forever-pain.

    Focus your effort and energy on the few schools having the desired academics, student culture, living environment, and influences that will help your child unleash the massive potential they have within themselves. If you do this, you'll enjoy forever-satisfaction!

    Validate & Prioritize

    Validate & Prioritize

    "You can do what you love and fail. But you can also do what you don't love and fail...and that's a lot worse."- Sean Cleveland, a great colleague of mine!

    I love that quote...thanks Sean!

    Parents most often validate and prioritize their own interests for their kids, over the interests of their kids. It's been the way of parenting for a long time...maybe forever.

    It works well when it comes to pack-survival, but not when it comes to creating successful opportunities and satisfactory outcomes for kids as they're turning into young adults.

    However, I see the beginning of a shift to occur. It's possibly inspired by the parents' response to the Covid-isolation of their kids.  

    In the last two years or so, I see a significant increase in a parent's willingness to better understand their child's deep internal passion and desire. And it's a beautiful thing.

    So, here's my greatest tip ever.

    The key to enabling your child to live the life that they most want for themselves, rather than the life you may want for them, is to be open-minded to hear their interests, validate their feelings, and prioritize their desires in life's most important matters
    COLLEGE, for one. Just make it about them.

    I simply call it- Validate and Prioritize!

    Parents need to establish parameters, boundaries, and standards in raising children. But it's just as important to encourage and facilitate the child's exploration and self-discovery. 
    This will lead to profound realizations which will then guide the pathway to a child's life success and satisfaction.

    My greatest tip ever-

    Validate and Prioritize, make it about them!